Indra Khairurizal

There are many types of shades ... but some people feel that I feel the most right now .. it is LOVE .. I have never felt this love before .. why I say that? it's because I have never felt such a deep love and meaningless as it is today .. yess! I really love him and do not know why .. I just know that I love him so bad .. One day, a time which makes me think, think about this love think about what I should do with this love .. I am 15 years old .. My teens .. I do not know what to do and time is running out so fast .. This condition has destroyed me .. the more I think about him, the more I love him .. we would be separated .. You know, I hate this part here .. after we graduated, we will not meet again .. but there are a few moments .. moments that will put an end to this love, it was his happy day ... I plan to buy something as a parting gift .. That's when her birthday .. I went to a store on the day before the happy day, I accompanied by my two best friends .. I bought a stuffed cat .. I then wrap with a beautiful ribbon .. I hope this will be something valuable for him .. I called him on the day happy and make some plans to bring us .. I work, we met at a plaza .. I give gifts and say that I love it .. He just smiled and said that he could not say anything .. then she said thank you and I go .. I walked with sadness in my shoulder, I had planned a lot of things with him as first and last time with him .. but I have to forget about it, because he did not want to .. he can not be with me .. I almost cried at that time .. actually not nearly .. but it really did cry .. I just wanted to look strong in front of me and my friends .. then an hour later, he sent me a message that he's sorry He said such a thing happened before .. he just see me as a friend, he liked me as a friend who is ready to help,, a friend who never stingy teraktir,, friend of the attention he needed a friend .. He even said that he would pray for me .. for me to find other women better than him is very difficult .. then he said sorry again and thanks to the happy smiles .. I acted like I was a strong man .. My reply to the message and said "Calm down, I could accept, we will be just as happy future" until the night comes .. I still think about it .. My heart feels very tight,,, I realized something .. My heart is broken .. I try to remember that moment and just makes me cry .. I have never cried because of love before, I just think that, maybe it was my first love .. Yeah .. he was my first love .. how poor I am .. how sad I am .. but now, I know I am a human being is no more .. I know what to do .. I tried to calm .. to reorganize my heart I want to go back to myself before I want to stop chasing more .. that day seemed to end the day .. I do not want to forget him .. I just know that I still love him no matter what may seem strange, but this is what I feel about this love .. love love love that can make me smile but could always make me cry .. and perhaps it is that we are better off just friends .. until now i still love her .. all the memories we are at school or wherever I'm with you now .. I still remember it ..